作者：牛腾宇妈妈
我的儿啊……
铁栏如利刃，横在你我之间，却斩不断母亲这一生最深的牵挂。
你剃着寸头，年仅十九岁，本该是风吹过脸庞都带着笑意的年纪，如今却只能站在昏暗的牢房里，用那双清亮的眼睛，默默望着我。
妈妈看得见你眼底的委屈，看得见你咬紧牙关不肯掉下的泪，也看得见那些年他们加诸在你身上的伤痕。一道一道，都刻在母亲心里，鲜血淋漓。
我站在铁窗外，身体早已千疮百孔，却仍拼尽全力举起这叠写满血泪的申诉材料。
眼泪止不住地往下掉，一滴、两滴、三滴……砸在纸上，洇开一圈又一圈的痛。
我没能护住你小小的身体，没能挡住这场从天而降的冤狱，只能用这双曾抱过你、哄过你、替你擦眼泪的手，如今颤抖着，握紧最后的希望。
孩子，你别怕。
妈妈知道你疼，那些酷刑、那些黑暗、那些强加于你的罪名，每一个夜晚都在折磨着你。
可你依然坚强地望着妈妈，像小时候跌倒了也不肯哭，只是不想让我担心。
那一刻，妈妈的心碎成了粉末，却还要强撑着微笑，只怕被你看见我的崩溃。
腾宇，我的命根子，我的心头肉，
妈妈还会继续去广东，哪怕一次次被威胁、被骚扰、被阻拦，哪怕每一步都像踩在刀尖上，妈妈也一定会为你拼到底。
风在为你哭，铁窗在为你颤。
如果老天有眼，就让母亲的眼泪化作一把火，烧尽这世间所有的黑暗与不公。
儿啊……
再坚持一下，妈妈来了。
我会用余生所有的力气、所有的眼泪、所有的爱，砸开这冰冷的铁窗，把你紧紧抱进怀里。
我要亲吻你剃短的头发，然后告诉你：
“孩子，回家了。妈妈再也不会让你受委屈了。”
妈妈爱你。用生命爱你。永远，永远……
Tears Behind Iron Bars
Author: Niu Tengyu’s Mother
My son…
The iron bars are like sharp blades, standing between you and me,
Yet they cannot sever a mother’s deepest longing in this life.
You have your hair cropped short, only nineteen years old,
An age when the wind blowing across your face should carry smiles,
Now you can only stand in the dim cell,
Using those clear eyes to gaze at me silently.
Mama can see the grievance in the depths of your eyes,
Can see the tears you hold back by clenching your teeth,
And can see the scars they inflicted upon your body all those years.
One by one, they are carved into a mother’s heart, dripping with fresh blood.
I stand outside the iron window,
My body is already riddled with a thousand holes,
Yet I still exert all my strength to raise this stack of appeal documents filled with blood and tears.
The tears cannot stop falling,
One drop, two drops, three drops…
Smashing onto the paper, soaking open circle after circle of pain.
I failed to protect your small body,
I failed to block this wrongful imprisonment that fell from the sky,
I can only use these hands that once held you, coaxed you, and wiped your tears,
Now trembling, gripping the final hope.
Child, do not be afraid.
Mama knows you are in pain, Those tortures, that darkness, those crimes forced upon you,
They torment you every single night.
Yet you still look at Mama steadfastly,
Just like when you were little and refused to cry after a fall,
Only because you didn’t want me to worry.
In that moment, Mama’s heart broke into powder,
Yet I still had to force a smile, Fearing only that you would see my collapse.
Tengyu, my lifeblood,
The flesh of my heart,
Mama will continue to go to Guangdong,
Even if threatened, harassed, and blocked time and again,
Even if every step feels like treading on the tip of a blade,
Mama will surely fight for you until the very end.
The wind is weeping for you,
The iron bars are trembling for you.
If the Heavens have eyes,
Let a mother’s tears turn into a fire,
To burn away all the darkness and injustice in this world.
My son…
Hold on just a little longer,
Mama is coming.
I will use all the strength, all the tears, and all the love of my remaining life,
To smash open these cold iron bars,
And hold you tightly in my arms.
I want to kiss your short-cropped hair,
And then tell you: “Child, come home.
Mama will never let you suffer grievance again.”
Mama loves you.
Loves you with her life. Forever, and ever…
